I hate liking someone it really sucks ass, especially having a crush on someone, seriously.
You just get butterflies in your stomach and feel like staring at their beautiful face >.<
Creepy, I know. But all emotions are sick when put out of context, and when not felt along with other people who feel the same.
She's really cute, you have no idea how many times I thought of just going up to her and asking her out. But I don't drive, and that kinda kills my confidence, probably because of what my sister said. My sister is a bit of a bitch sometimes, because her words are just sharp and deadly especially if you're not prepared for her next inconsiderate/harsh word, and you never will be.
But I don't care, I don't want the license, I'm a spaz when it comes to driving, I suck at it and I don't really enjoy it much, fuck that. Problem is that Jordan's public trasnportation sucks.
Anyway for some reason I think people love people with cars. It's like a sense of security for them or whatever. So probably I'll be alone until I get a car, even though I hate cars, and don't crave them, and would hate to be driving in traffic, though you have to do that in order to survive. Must we really lock ourselves away in our own little boxes the whole time?
The fact that people only use their private cars is something that increases the barrier between people (SOCIAL EXCLUSION, MAN!) in Jordan. And I make a point when I don't drive. I believe that I change a person every single time I tell a taxi driver that "people don't go to a university to fuck or get fucked."
You would scream racist slurs at someone and they wouldn't defend themselves, and you wouldn't be heard, so you wouldn't feel good, and they'd just not care and think they're okay. I mean seriously, how can you change something if you don't stand up for it?
It's like that in Jordan; there's a war in the street; yeah, I mean it's literally in the street. Every person is in their car, like it's their own prison cell, and they don't deal with anyone else, the impact of that is clear; everyone slows down, everyone is seperated from everyone else.
I think if the public (if you can even call people in Jordan public) sticks together, we can get a much better country. But in our current situation, if the upper class sticks together, they can't change anything, and if the lower class sticks together it can't do anything. So basically we're seperated and fucked and we're a dumb bunch of people. Truth is there is no definition of "class" in Jordan.
In extremes, there are 4 classes in Jordan. There are basically the people with little money, and the people with a whole lot of money, then there are the people with little money who are educated so they seem like they have money, and the people with a lot of money who are uneducated and shallow.
I'm starting to think that fixing public transportation, along with the obvious (education), is the first way to start fixing our country. Think about it, it's cheaper, it's more environmentally friendly, it's easier to organize yourself with it, it provides more jobs, it improves productivity, it allows people to move around without being demotivated, it increases acceptance when people interact together, it allows interaction.
Well why the wait? Why isn't anyone making that step? Yes, we have busses, but the people are not really connected yet, why would anyone use a bus if they feel like they're going to be violated in there?
This is when the government comes into play. We always whine, but we don't do much about it, they can force us. Yet we can pressure them for what we want, only if we're aware of something and are actually willing to do something. Let's help eachother out, no?
10 months ago